Math Fail

Written by: Denis Gannon(to the tune of "Oh, Christmas Tree")

Oh, Calculus; Oh, Calculus,How tough are both your branches.Oh, Calculus; Oh, Calculus,To pass what are my chances?Derivatives I cannot take,At integrals my fingers shake.Oh, Calculus; Oh, Calculus,How tough are both your branches.

Oh, Calculus; Oh, Calculus,Your theorems I can't master.Oh, Calculus; Oh, Calculus,My Proofs are a disaster.You pull a trick out of the air,Or find a reason, God knows where.Oh, Calculus; Oh, Calculus,Your theorems I can't master.

Oh, Calculus; Oh, Calculus,Your problems do distress me.Oh, Calculus; Oh, Calculus,Related rates depress me.I walk toward lampposts in my sleep,And running water makes me weep.Oh, Calculus; Oh, Calculus,Your problems do distress me.

Oh, Calculus; Oh,Calculus,My limit I am reaching.Oh, Calculus; Oh, Calculus,For mercy I'm beseeching.My grades do not approach a B,They're just an epsilon from D.Oh, Calculus; Oh,Calculus,My limit I am reaching.